Returning home after a full day of cleaning and painting the cafe and shopping for provisions I returned home late with fresh produce from the market. After cleaning my house and a nice long bath, I made pumpkin curry, rice and pickled carrots.
It was very simple given the lack of ingredients and equipment I have. But it was ridiculously tasty. Unbelievably amazing.
I was so excited with happiness and joy. Not hyper. Just very very high and ecstatic.
Then as I sat trying to enjoy and calm down, my younger brother msgs. He has been posted to the border for a while starting tomorrow.
My happy high has now converted to worry and sadness. He is the smartest amongst us who chose the defense job because my aunt wouldn’t stop nagging him about a government job. A talented creative sensitive smart boy is now an army man. My baby! And he msged me asking me to take care of myself.
Don’t know what I’m feeling any longer. I just am feeling everything very intensely. And not feeling anything at all.