Day 55 part 2- Flippant moods

All set for a call with A. We spend a few mins coochie cooing and in happiness. He pampers my inner panda and all is well with the world.

Few mins later he acts surprised about our dinner date. And while I try explaining something to him, he is unable to hear. And that is enough for my mood to switch. I act normal but feel very very sad, low and irritated.

He understands and talks me through it. And I take the effort to not think in the disorderly way my mind works and understand and evolve.

In 5 mins, with my spirits back on track, we continue talking.

I love him for helping me understand and figure this out. I worry about the time he won’t be able to or interested in. I want to do this to myself… This thought correction. I was able to last year which is why I stopped medication and therapy. But now after a year of dealing with baggage and maintaining a relationship alongside it, I’m tired. And without my effort, I’m back to these insensible thoughts.

Should work on it again. Should prioritize again. Thank you world, thank you A. A Thanksgiving message is long overdue. πŸ™‚

2 thoughts on “Day 55 part 2- Flippant moods

  1. So I went crazy long before I met my boyfriend… I always wonder how it would have gone if we would have been dating during that. He still doesn’t really understand the full-on crazy shit I did… He’s just like “Well you’re cured now!”

    Anyways! I’m enjoying looking through your blog πŸ™‚

    • Hahaha.. I so understand that. Sometimes I don’t really take it in good humour. I want to knock the other person on the head with whatever I can get my hands on πŸ˜€ sometimes πŸ˜‰
      Thanks… Do keep sharing

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