If things that happen, make me junk instead of dealing with them in a healthier fashion, then that’s on me… It’s my mistake. Aware conscious me should know better. And should def try harder to do better.

But what if it’s stuff people say? And what if they say things despite knowing that it’ll affect me this badly. This adversely. Is it still on me? Or can they help by being sensitive?

But then… What if they can’t do any better? Then are we just a wrong match?

Advice please.


6 thoughts on “Responsibility

  1. It’s a fine line. At some point, people need to be sensitive to others. However, we are also responsible for our own feelings, and only we can decide how we feel. Ultimately others can not choose our feelings, they can’t make us feel a certain way. We choose how to react. When confronted with feelings brought on by others, I have to consciously, in the moment, think about what I am feeling and why. I then have to decide how to deal with that. If my feelings are brought on by someone else, I have to decide whether to keep or ditch the feeling. It really is a learning process, and one that I am continuously learning.

    • Hmmm… Makes sense. But then don’t you have that one person with whom you can let your guard down and not think or process or anything. Just be.
      Shouldn’t we have?

      • I agree with what Iggy said. As far as having that one person who you can let your guard down, my husband is that for me. I have some friends like that too. The key in letting your guard down and just “being” around them for me is that I know there is no judgement going on from them.

  2. Hmmm… C was that one person. But she died. My ex husband is the only other person I have. And there is a limit to how much I can depend on him. Even the guy I dated, my family, my ‘friends’ all need me to be what they call ‘me’. Sorted. Think. Process. Respond. And I understand the need to be that way. But when do I get to react? To be me? To let go and be? I’m scared I’ll never find someone who understands that need. Coz what do they get in return? Don’t they deserve better?

  3. Sorry… Was on a major venting spree. Sorry for taking it out on the both of you. 🙂 I vent enough on this blog, to keep me going in my other life. Not sure if that’s the healthiest thing to do… But that’s what I do currently. Thank you 🙂

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